








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 58 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
568 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,720 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 449 | 26% |
| Smokes | 404 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 516 | 30% |
| Molotovs | 351 | 20% |
Our logs show you have wasted $167,716 of utility $147 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #11 | Aspekt_347 | 50% | 8 |
| #12 | Baron von Schmand und Faktor II. | 50% | 10 |
| #13 | Naddelx3 | 43% | 7 |
| #14 | Baron Charles v. Sprayhausen II. | 40% | 5 |
| #15 | H4rleym3ch4nic #derankservice | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baron Cast0r II. | 2 | 0.0187 |
| #2 | Baron von Schmand und Faktor II. | 1 | 0.0053 |
| #3 | Aspekt_347 | 1 | 0.0071 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Baron A B S 1 C H T II. | +6.49 | 69 | 71 |
| #2 | Baron von Schmand und Faktor II. | +5.61 | 58 | 66 |
| #3 | Baron Spray Charles II. | +5.39 | 66 | 57 |
| #4 | Baron Charles v. Sprayhausen II. | +4.73 | 81 | 70 |
| #5 | Baron Cast0r II. | +4.69 | 71 | 65 |





