








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1275 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 312 matches | ||
| Faceit | 167 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Renown | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 78 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




72 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6363 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 24,873 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7311 | 29% |
| Smokes | 4732 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 6191 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 6639 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,500,199 of utility $121 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 3430 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Biotic | 73% | 33 |
| #2 | Chrisbe | 63% | 30 |
| #3 | DodFather | 61% | 36 |
| #4 | Incipiens | 61% | 107 |
| #5 | Mantissa | 57% | 47 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | Mantissa | 57% | 47 |
| #6 | yame | 57% | 49 |
| #7 | Eero normal | 54% | 202 |
| #8 | Electro | 54% | 227 |
| #9 | Smeik | 50% | 56 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Electro | 26 | 0.0054 |
| #2 | Eero normal | 15 | 0.0035 |
| #3 | yame | 6 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Incipiens | 2 | 0.0009 |
| #5 | Smeik | 2 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Eero normal | 626 | 0.15 | 16 min |
| #2 | Electro | 591 | 0.12 | 16 min |
| #3 | Mantissa | 211 | 0.21 | 6 min |
| #4 | yame | 140 | 0.14 | 3 min |
| #5 | Incipiens | 130 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Krzyz | +2.26 | 80 | 70 |
| #2 | Incipiens | +1.63 | 66 | 69 |
| #3 | Mantissa | +0.29 | 64 | 73 |
| #4 | Electro | +0.01 | 76 | 69 |
| #5 | Biotic | -0.31 | 55 | 68 |





