








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 122 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
504 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 882 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 185 | 21% |
| Smokes | 234 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 167 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 296 | 34% |
Our logs show you have wasted $225,125 of utility $208 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 25 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #6 | Clewer | 55% | 11 |
| #7 | (TheRealCatArmy) jockecknocke | 50% | 6 |
| #8 | Lillzencon ツ™ | 50% | 12 |
| #9 | plopp | 48% | 31 |
| #10 | eXampL | 38% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | plopp | 62 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #2 | ⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻ | 49 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| #3 | Lillzencon ツ™ | 36 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| #4 | Clewer | 23 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Jarad | 23 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jarad | +8.97 | 64 | 43 |
| #2 | (TheRealCatArmy) jockecknocke | +4.21 | 77 | 70 |
| #3 | ⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻⸻ | +3.70 | 77 | 56 |
| #4 | plopp | +3.36 | 79 | 52 |
| #5 | Lillzencon ツ™ | +1.23 | 66 | 81 |





