








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 156 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 17 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 7 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
401 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 701 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 157 | 22% |
| Smokes | 158 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 129 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 257 | 37% |
Our logs show you have wasted $224,966 of utility $199 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 54 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akali | 71% | 17 |
| #2 | groovy | 70% | 10 |
| #3 | bingy | 55% | 42 |
| #4 | flea in a jar | 44% | 25 |
| #5 | Olaf | 43% | 35 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bingy | 12 | 0.0141 |
| #2 | Olaf | 9 | 0.0139 |
| #3 | flea in a jar | 3 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | akali | 3 | 0.0086 |
| #5 | Jolly | 1 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | akali | +6.57 | 89 | 42 |
| #2 | flea in a jar | +4.17 | 34 | 64 |
| #3 | bingy | +3.84 | 86 | 64 |
| #4 | Jolly | -1.59 | 52 | 69 |
| #5 | deetus | -2.78 | 42 | 34 |





