








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 5 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
566 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,515 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 284 | 19% |
| Smokes | 512 | 34% |
| HE Grenades | 491 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 228 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $110,488 of utility $67 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 14 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prolintos | 54% | 41 |
| #2 | Segfault | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | judabricopouri | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | checo | 36% | 25 |
| #5 | sand | 25% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Prolintos | 54% | 41 |
| #2 | Segfault | 48% | 42 |
| #3 | judabricopouri | 46% | 41 |
| #4 | checo | 36% | 25 |
| #5 | sand | 25% | 20 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | judabricopouri | 2 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Prolintos | 2 | 0.0024 |
| #3 | checo | 2 | 0.0038 |
| #4 | Segfault | 1 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | checo | 36 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #2 | sand | 33 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #3 | Segfault | 28 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #4 | Prolintos | 27 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | judabricopouri | 21 | 0.02 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | checo | +5.61 | 74 | 39 |
| #2 | sand | +0.96 | 61 | 54 |
| #3 | Sick My Ducks | -0.31 | 52 | 41 |
| #4 | Segfault | -0.72 | 44 | 36 |
| #5 | judabricopouri | -2.19 | 35 | 28 |





