








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 250 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 174 matches | ||
| Faceit | 154 matches | ||
| Renown | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 5 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3953 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,179 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2976 | 24% |
| Smokes | 2981 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 3109 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 3113 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,826,693 of utility $209 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 312 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nosakaツ 30hz | 62% | 39 |
| #2 | Ruvaloツ | 59% | 44 |
| #3 | Succ God | 58% | 31 |
| #4 | mOgens | 58% | 26 |
| #5 | ✪ Smyrilツ | 57% | 42 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | eden | 50% | 24 |
| #9 | Birkis | 50% | 24 |
| #10 | J.e-R- | 50% | 30 |
| #11 | ranihood | 46% | 156 |
| #12 | Lundin | 43% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | green | 11 | 0.0024 |
| #2 | J.e-R- | 3 | 0.0045 |
| #3 | ranihood | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | Ruvaloツ | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | Succ God | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | green | 476 | 0.10 | 13 min |
| #2 | ranihood | 285 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #3 | ✪ sleis | 247 | 0.16 | 7 min |
| #4 | Ruvaloツ | 204 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #5 | Nosakaツ 30hz | 159 | 0.16 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mOgens | +5.00 | 90 | 63 |
| #2 | eden | +2.36 | 81 | 72 |
| #3 | Ruvaloツ | +1.74 | 80 | 74 |
| #4 | green | +1.43 | 58 | 62 |
| #5 | ✪ Smyrilツ | +1.16 | 85 | 66 |





