








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Premier | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




16 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1297 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,551 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1145 | 32% |
| Smokes | 971 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 1223 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 212 | 6% |
Our logs show you have wasted $310,786 of utility $89 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 16 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOOLI | 53% | 17 |
| #2 | [WSC]🖤CandyCrusade🖤 | 48% | 21 |
| #3 | Sugarcrisp | 44% | 18 |
| #4 | [RSG] dEUCE | 43% | 82 |
| #5 | JustDub_ | 40% | 30 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [RSG] dEUCE | 9 | 0.0053 |
| #2 | WOOLI | 4 | 0.0117 |
| #3 | SilentKilla | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | Sugarcrisp | 2 | 0.0055 |
| #5 | JustDub_ | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | [WSC]🖤CandyCrusade🖤 | 95 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #2 | [RSG] dEUCE | 77 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #3 | JustDub_ | 47 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| #4 | SilentKilla | 44 | 0.09 | 1 min |
| #5 | WOOLI | 32 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WOOLI | +4.07 | 51 | 66 |
| #2 | A n O n y M o u S | +2.42 | 71 | 53 |
| #3 | [RSG] dEUCE | +1.62 | 78 | 44 |
| #4 | Sugarcrisp | -1.25 | 44 | 57 |
| #5 | [WSC]🖤CandyCrusade🖤 | -1.43 | 16 | 49 |





