








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 4 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Premier | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 1 Chicken Has been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1235 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,669 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1589 | 28% |
| Smokes | 1680 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 1129 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 1271 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $271,422 of utility $92 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 38 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Anthony | 61% | 61 |
| #2 | Skrub | 60% | 10 |
| #3 | nottyboy | 60% | 10 |
| #4 | Zing | 58% | 81 |
| #5 | c0nsy | 57% | 76 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Zing | 58% | 81 |
| #5 | c0nsy | 57% | 76 |
| #6 | Syn | 56% | 9 |
| #7 | Boyller | 53% | 58 |
| #8 | Karson | 50% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0nsy | 9 | 0.0057 |
| #2 | Zing | 7 | 0.0042 |
| #3 | Anthony | 3 | 0.0025 |
| #4 | Boyller | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | Karson | 1 | 0.0030 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0nsy | 280 | 0.18 | 6 min |
| #2 | Anthony | 229 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| #3 | Zing | 155 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #4 | Boyller | 122 | 0.10 | 4 min |
| #5 | Karson | 118 | 0.36 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c0nsy | +2.69 | 76 | 62 |
| #2 | Karson | +2.40 | 76 | 71 |
| #3 | poch | +0.85 | 73 | 70 |
| #4 | Anthony | +0.67 | 74 | 64 |
| #5 | nottyboy | +0.35 | 78 | 58 |





