








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 7 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 196 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 9 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1885 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,724 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1898 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1888 | 33% |
| HE Grenades | 1306 | 23% |
| Molotovs | 632 | 11% |
Our logs show you have wasted $523,454 of utility $112 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 5 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3lectr0o | 53% | 95 |
| #2 | Aeonyツ | 51% | 124 |
| #3 | TeeKay | 44% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3lectr0o | 53% | 95 |
| #2 | Aeonyツ | 51% | 124 |
| #3 | TeeKay | 44% | 59 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aeonyツ | 9 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | TeeKay | 3 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aeonyツ | 485 | 0.19 | 11 min |
| #2 | 3lectr0o | 403 | 0.20 | 11 min |
| #3 | TeeKay | 243 | 0.19 | 6 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3lectr0o | +2.33 | 76 | 67 |
| #2 | SAAAANIIC!! | -0.67 | 77 | 61 |
| #3 | Aeonyツ | -0.90 | 61 | 55 |
| #4 | TeeKay | -2.71 | 44 | 70 |





