








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 207 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September


The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 13 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 6 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




12 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1842 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,242 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1260 | 30% |
| Smokes | 660 | 16% |
| HE Grenades | 1214 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 1108 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $855,314 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 34 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gay with cheats | 48% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gay with cheats | 48% | 104 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gay with cheats | 22 | 0.0105 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gay with cheats | 293 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | gay with cheats | +4.77 | 87 | 34 |
| #2 | Joe | -1.81 | 32 | 40 |





