








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 68 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 91 matches | ||
| Faceit | 47 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1502 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,444 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1542 | 21% |
| Smokes | 2062 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 1780 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2060 | 28% |
Our logs show you have wasted $288,858 of utility $80 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 11 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | SläX | 67% | 9 |
| #2 | ap | 49% | 91 |
| #3 | INIMIGO DO CRACHÁ | 49% | 35 |
| #4 | ctrl shift n | 48% | 97 |
| #5 | ghost | 47% | 135 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | ctrl shift n | 48% | 97 |
| #5 | ghost | 47% | 135 |
| #6 | AVELINO | 45% | 49 |
| #7 | nylundd- | 45% | 87 |
| #8 | Khan | 44% | 18 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | AVELINO | 7 | 0.0070 |
| #2 | ghost | 4 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | ap | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #4 | ctrl shift n | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | nylundd- | 2 | 0.0011 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ap | 424 | 0.22 | 9 min |
| #2 | ghost | 371 | 0.13 | 8 min |
| #3 | nylundd- | 259 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | ctrl shift n | 194 | 0.09 | 4 min |
| #5 | AVELINO | 123 | 0.12 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ap | +1.45 | 77 | 60 |
| #2 | Khan | +1.39 | 69 | 66 |
| #3 | AVELINO | +1.25 | 58 | 73 |
| #4 | SläX | +0.66 | 59 | 67 |
| #5 | jAy | +0.52 | 57 | 70 |





