








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 405 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 193 matches | ||
| Esplay | 16 matches | 1,769 | |
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Wingman | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 31 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2410 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,516 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2223 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2412 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 2803 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2078 | 22% |
Our logs show you have wasted $887,872 of utility $150 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 309 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | M_Iceman ~c'> ? | 65% | 20 |
| #2 | discokjelle | 63% | 19 |
| #3 | ☠нєииσĸs☠ | 56% | 50 |
| #4 | Husssar | 55% | 20 |
| #5 | almefjord | 54% | 24 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Dilligaf | 7 | 0.0025 |
| #2 | almefjord | 3 | 0.0067 |
| #3 | Denka | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ☠нєииσĸs☠ | 2 | 0.0019 |
| #5 | WozzeC | 2 | 0.0020 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eMMa Karlsson | 352 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #2 | Kamikaze | 220 | 0.09 | 7 min |
| #3 | Dilligaf | 157 | 0.06 | 4 min |
| #4 | WozzeC | 136 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | almefjord | 95 | 0.21 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Denka | +1.72 | 79 | 68 |
| #2 | eMMa Karlsson | +0.98 | 58 | 65 |
| #3 | discokjelle | +0.93 | 66 | 79 |
| #4 | WozzeC | +0.86 | 60 | 76 |
| #5 | Husssar | +0.74 | 74 | 64 |





