








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 634 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 362 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 85 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




14 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5319 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 22,073 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7753 | 35% |
| Smokes | 6026 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 3572 | 16% |
| Molotovs | 4722 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $811,006 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 398 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Roerr | 65% | 26 |
| #2 | bleu | 64% | 28 |
| #3 | kjellepow | 59% | 37 |
| #4 | KP | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | ChaXii | 53% | 139 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 8jolle | 11 | 0.0023 |
| #2 | Larry | 7 | 0.0021 |
| #3 | OrmSkägg | 6 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ChaXii | 6 | 0.0021 |
| #5 | Miche | 4 | 0.0006 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Miche | 1321 | 0.21 | 37 min |
| #2 | 8jolle | 889 | 0.19 | 21 min |
| #3 | ChaXii | 587 | 0.20 | 17 min |
| #4 | Oz | 530 | 0.19 | 16 min |
| #5 | Larry | 462 | 0.14 | 13 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bleu | +4.20 | 78 | 77 |
| #2 | ChaXii | +4.09 | 74 | 64 |
| #3 | kjellepow | +3.05 | 78 | 68 |
| #4 | |DIRAC> | +1.77 | 74 | 74 |
| #5 | Miche | +0.49 | 65 | 68 |





