








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 362 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 141 matches | ||
| Wingman | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 15 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2181 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,788 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3271 | 37% |
| Smokes | 2220 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 1853 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1444 | 16% |
Our logs show you have wasted $523,241 of utility $90 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 546 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zeka | 48% | 71 |
| #2 | imr1h | 45% | 197 |
| #3 | ymirjar | 45% | 20 |
| #4 | Krul | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | ✪ quacke | 44% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ymirjar | 45% | 20 |
| #4 | Krul | 44% | 18 |
| #5 | ✪ quacke | 44% | 66 |
| #6 | T0xicake | 33% | 48 |
| #7 | c1hack | 25% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | imr1h | 20 | 0.0052 |
| #2 | zeka | 10 | 0.0070 |
| #3 | T0xicake | 5 | 0.0050 |
| #4 | ✪ quacke | 4 | 0.0030 |
| #5 | ymirjar | 3 | 0.0074 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | imr1h | 1334 | 0.35 | 32 min |
| #2 | ✪ quacke | 251 | 0.19 | 8 min |
| #3 | zeka | 186 | 0.13 | 6 min |
| #4 | ymirjar | 158 | 0.39 | 4 min |
| #5 | T0xicake | 91 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ymirjar | +3.19 | 77 | 74 |
| #2 | zeka | +1.52 | 75 | 67 |
| #3 | imr1h | +0.96 | 76 | 62 |
| #4 | c1hack | +0.53 | 61 | 61 |
| #5 | T0xicake | -0.01 | 49 | 40 |





