








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 341 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 48 matches | ||
| Premier | 23 matches | ||
| Esplay | 12 matches | 1,629 | |
| Competitive Train | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Faceit | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




9 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1171 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,799 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1567 | 33% |
| Smokes | 1197 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 907 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 1128 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $722,765 of utility $223 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 985 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | zeka | 57% | 21 |
| #2 | ThugLifeLegend | 44% | 66 |
| #3 | imr1h | 43% | 101 |
| #4 | JoeAWESOME | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | T0xicake | 36% | 22 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | imr1h | 43% | 101 |
| #4 | JoeAWESOME | 40% | 10 |
| #5 | T0xicake | 36% | 22 |
| #6 | c1hack | 30% | 10 |
| #7 | ✪ kyuber | 22% | 9 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | imr1h | 24 | 0.0128 |
| #2 | ThugLifeLegend | 5 | 0.0038 |
| #3 | T0xicake | 5 | 0.0111 |
| #4 | zeka | 4 | 0.0094 |
| #5 | ✪ kyuber | 2 | 0.0122 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | imr1h | 566 | 0.30 | 13 min |
| #2 | ThugLifeLegend | 305 | 0.23 | 6 min |
| #3 | zeka | 62 | 0.15 | 2 min |
| #4 | JoeAWESOME | 59 | 0.27 | 2 min |
| #5 | ✪ kyuber | 37 | 0.23 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ kyuber | +2.54 | 75 | 57 |
| #2 | zeka | +1.15 | 75 | 63 |
| #3 | imr1h | +0.73 | 78 | 58 |
| #4 | c1hack | +0.03 | 70 | 50 |
| #5 | T0xicake | -0.37 | 52 | 30 |





