








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 524 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 191 matches | ||
| Premier | 150 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 51 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




66 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5433 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 16,211 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5338 | 33% |
| Smokes | 4562 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2194 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 4117 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,743,428 of utility $164 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 568 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boo | 54% | 81 |
| #2 | $latty #Wholder | 52% | 42 |
| #3 | Tibbs | 48% | 60 |
| #4 | edit | 48% | 225 |
| #5 | shabuki | 47% | 121 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | edit | 748 | 0.15 | 18 min |
| #2 | shabuki | 298 | 0.11 | 7 min |
| #3 | $latty #Wholder | 131 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | Boo | 98 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tibbs | 96 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Boo | +1.97 | 84 | 58 |
| #2 | shok | +1.67 | 77 | 62 |
| #3 | edit | +0.75 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | shabuki | +0.68 | 85 | 49 |
| #5 | Tibbs | -0.35 | 74 | 50 |





