








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 88 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




1 of your human shaped victims was your teammate...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
292 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,045 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 175 | 17% |
| Smokes | 249 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 286 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 335 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $83,402 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 40 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WuhzGood | 71% | 7 |
| #2 | Gobbles | 67% | 6 |
| #3 | BAL3 | 67% | 6 |
| #4 | ♕ | 50% | 2 |
| #5 | Kensjio | 50% | 2 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | میمو سیکسی اے | 1 | 0.0079 |
| #2 | beemo | 1 | 0.0112 |
| #3 | Magiic | 1 | 0.0152 |
| #4 | big bitties | 1 | 0.0172 |
| #5 | ♕ | 1 | 0.0217 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BAL3 | 45 | 0.34 | 1 min |
| #2 | میمو سیکسی اے | 37 | 0.29 | 1 min |
| #3 | Gobbles | 21 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | WuhzGood | 20 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #5 | beemo | 20 | 0.22 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | WuhzGood | +3.30 | 67 | 20 |
| #2 | beemo | +2.43 | 88 | 41 |
| #3 | Kensjio | +1.93 | 48 | 66 |
| #4 | BAL3 | +1.53 | 52 | 50 |
| #5 | Magiic | +1.32 | 83 | 46 |





