








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 238 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Premier | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
785 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,789 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1477 | 39% |
| Smokes | 831 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 533 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 948 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $207,767 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 226 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | O . O | 100% | 5 |
| #2 | BeanBurrito | 88% | 8 |
| #3 | 守株待兔 | 83% | 6 |
| #4 | vale | 80% | 5 |
| #5 | poor chigga | 80% | 5 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | FRAQ-KTR | 64% | 11 |
| #9 | ava | 60% | 20 |
| #10 | kevbra36west | 58% | 24 |
| #11 | 14vibrancy | 57% | 23 |
| #12 | Ayeggs | 43% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ava | 6 | 0.0155 |
| #2 | 14vibrancy | 5 | 0.0108 |
| #3 | kevbra36west | 3 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | Tylenol | 1 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | BeanBurrito | 1 | 0.0061 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ava | 82 | 0.21 | 2 min |
| #2 | 14vibrancy | 76 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #3 | FRAQ-KTR | 60 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| #4 | BeanBurrito | 30 | 0.18 | 1 min |
| #5 | poor chigga | 23 | 0.24 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ava | +3.88 | 78 | 62 |
| #2 | Tylenol | +2.47 | 62 | 31 |
| #3 | SnakeG | +2.23 | 83 | 72 |
| #4 | 14vibrancy | +2.20 | 83 | 56 |
| #5 | Johnny219 | +1.16 | 80 | 58 |





