








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 558 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 130 matches | ||
| Wingman | 49 matches | ||
| Faceit | 33 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Renown | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Grail | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 20 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3999 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,530 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 4567 | 40% |
| Smokes | 3002 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2406 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 1555 | 13% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,234,797 of utility $153 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 373 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | phasmo | 57% | 146 |
| #2 | vdestr | 56% | 108 |
| #3 | StYl3z | 56% | 203 |
| #4 | BlazeNoam | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | rainer jr. | 54% | 127 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | BlazeNoam | 54% | 54 |
| #5 | rainer jr. | 54% | 127 |
| #6 | ΩfficerDomΞ | 52% | 91 |
| #7 | s1xsense | 50% | 171 |
| #8 | Schnowii | 45% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StYl3z | 11 | 0.0026 |
| #2 | ΩfficerDomΞ | 6 | 0.0033 |
| #3 | s1xsense | 4 | 0.0012 |
| #4 | rainer jr. | 4 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | phasmo | 3 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | StYl3z | 578 | 0.14 | 16 min |
| #2 | s1xsense | 505 | 0.15 | 13 min |
| #3 | phasmo | 427 | 0.14 | 12 min |
| #4 | rainer jr. | 280 | 0.11 | 8 min |
| #5 | BlazeNoam | 153 | 0.13 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | phasmo | +3.84 | 69 | 66 |
| #2 | StYl3z | +2.16 | 81 | 64 |
| #3 | Kinrowd | +1.67 | 79 | 59 |
| #4 | s1xsense | +1.29 | 75 | 54 |
| #5 | rainer jr. | -0.37 | 60 | 58 |





