








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 708 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Wingman | 180 matches | ||
| Premier | 175 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 85 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 22 different maps





Our logs show 107 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




17 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4675 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,250 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3308 | 27% |
| Smokes | 3291 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2617 | 21% |
| Molotovs | 3034 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,434,469 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 204 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wilf | 52% | 136 |
| #2 | Budget Wolverine | 52% | 590 |
| #3 | baby boss | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | ♡ Scooby ♡ | 48% | 62 |
| #5 | snail | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wilf | 52% | 136 |
| #2 | Budget Wolverine | 52% | 590 |
| #3 | baby boss | 50% | 48 |
| #4 | ♡ Scooby ♡ | 48% | 62 |
| #5 | snail | 47% | 66 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Budget Wolverine | 12 | 0.0011 |
| #2 | wilf | 3 | 0.0011 |
| #3 | snail | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #4 | ♡ Scooby ♡ | 2 | 0.0015 |
| #5 | baby boss | 1 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Budget Wolverine | 1169 | 0.11 | 30 min |
| #2 | wilf | 230 | 0.08 | 4 min |
| #3 | baby boss | 72 | 0.07 | 2 min |
| #4 | snail | 39 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #5 | ♡ Scooby ♡ | 37 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | wilf | +3.01 | 88 | 47 |
| #2 | Budget Wolverine | +2.89 | 62 | 59 |
| #3 | baby boss | +0.46 | 71 | 50 |
| #4 | Professor [w]oof | -1.19 | 65 | 54 |
| #5 | snail | -1.91 | 51 | 42 |





