










System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 0 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.

| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 17 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 3 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




5 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
236 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 536 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 150 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3 | 1% |
| HE Grenades | 208 | 39% |
| Molotovs | 175 | 33% |
Our logs show you have wasted $75,649 of utility $138 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jolly good show | 50% | 2 |
| #2 | tax fraud | 50% | 4 |
| #3 | runttu | 35% | 17 |
| #4 | jorma | 33% | 6 |
| #5 | JoonaZZ | 27% | 26 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | JoonaZZ | 43 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #2 | runttu | 10 | 0.03 | 0 min |
| #3 | jorma | 8 | 0.08 | 0 min |
| #4 | tax fraud | 8 | 0.10 | 0 min |
| #5 | LakkisPekkis | 5 | 0.04 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jolly good show | +1.33 | 57 | 38 |
| #2 | JoonaZZ | +1.29 | 52 | 69 |
| #3 | runttu | -1.40 | 79 | 30 |
| #4 | YGWYW | -1.58 | 46 | 44 |
| #5 | tax fraud | -2.51 | 40 | 46 |





