








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 20 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 173 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1800 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,565 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2037 | 27% |
| Smokes | 1556 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 2571 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 1401 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $647,293 of utility $136 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 28 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luke.J | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | ✪ Quigers | 53% | 57 |
| #3 | DjL | 51% | 103 |
| #4 | Majestic | 50% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Luke.J | 58% | 12 |
| #2 | ✪ Quigers | 53% | 57 |
| #3 | DjL | 51% | 103 |
| #4 | Majestic | 50% | 198 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Majestic | 13 | 0.0030 |
| #2 | DjL | 5 | 0.0023 |
| #3 | ✪ Quigers | 5 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Majestic | 374 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #2 | DjL | 271 | 0.12 | 8 min |
| #3 | ✪ Quigers | 37 | 0.03 | 1 min |
| #4 | Luke.J | 34 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪ Quigers | +2.10 | 74 | 54 |
| #2 | Majestic | +0.78 | 71 | 59 |
| #3 | Assassin | +0.01 | 52 | 63 |
| #4 | DjL | -0.73 | 51 | 75 |
| #5 | Luke.J | -4.54 | 26 | 62 |





