








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 5 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




39 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1270 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 4,185 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2104 | 50% |
| Smokes | 839 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 631 | 15% |
| Molotovs | 611 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $241,709 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 212 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | king von | 45% | 33 |
| #2 | Twizzy Rich | 44% | 9 |
| #3 | AntelopeFunny | 42% | 12 |
| #4 | crash | 41% | 17 |
| #5 | shugg | 40% | 15 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jorden Woods | 115 | 0.14 | 2 min |
| #2 | crash | 107 | 0.32 | 1 min |
| #3 | king von | 92 | 0.13 | 2 min |
| #4 | shugg | 45 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #5 | AntelopeFunny | 37 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | king von | +6.41 | 89 | 48 |
| #2 | Twizzy Rich | +6.11 | 75 | 35 |
| #3 | crash | +5.22 | 83 | 35 |
| #4 | shugg | +4.34 | 91 | 63 |
| #5 | AntelopeFunny | +0.86 | 69 | 32 |





