








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 572 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 308 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 75 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 53 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 52 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 41 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 36 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 25 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Edin | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 48 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




47 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6192 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 27,783 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 8744 | 31% |
| Smokes | 7220 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 5412 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 6407 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,315,666 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 300 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Aqukinn<3 | 54% | 111 |
| #2 | CopyDoge | 48% | 495 |
| #3 | 黑糖珍珠 | 48% | 147 |
| #4 | CopyBear | 47% | 767 |
| #5 | Qing | 47% | 468 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Libra | 2554 | 0.23 | 80 min |
| #2 | Qing | 1652 | 0.17 | 42 min |
| #3 | CopyDoge | 932 | 0.09 | 19 min |
| #4 | CopyBear | 726 | 0.05 | 20 min |
| #5 | Aqukinn<3 | 350 | 0.16 | 7 min |





