








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 531 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 42 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
773 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,450 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 785 | 32% |
| Smokes | 754 | 31% |
| HE Grenades | 266 | 11% |
| Molotovs | 645 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $264,573 of utility $159 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 299 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Paint Thinner AKA baiterwood | 67% | 6 |
| #2 | ★ GongaNotOfficial | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | Mr Gurns | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | kenny | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Doraj_ | 57% | 7 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | ★ GongaNotOfficial | 60% | 5 |
| #3 | Mr Gurns | 59% | 17 |
| #4 | kenny | 57% | 7 |
| #5 | Doraj_ | 57% | 7 |
| #6 | area o/ | 43% | 28 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Mr Gurns | 2 | 0.0060 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | area o/ | 88 | 0.16 | 2 min |
| #2 | Mr Gurns | 23 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| #3 | kenny | 23 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #4 | Doraj_ | 14 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #5 | ★ GongaNotOfficial | 12 | 0.11 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | fWEAKAZOID | +2.87 | 78 | 61 |
| #2 | ★ GongaNotOfficial | +1.78 | 82 | 49 |
| #3 | Mr Gurns | +1.17 | 78 | 51 |
| #4 | kenny | +1.16 | 68 | 59 |
| #5 | area o/ | -0.94 | 65 | 62 |





