








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 549 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 115 matches | ||
| Wingman | 74 matches | ||
| Faceit | 64 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 79 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2606 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,729 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3596 | 34% |
| Smokes | 2909 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 2176 | 20% |
| Molotovs | 2048 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $638,624 of utility $119 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 72 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 57% | 131 |
| #2 | ゼロツー | 57% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 57% | 131 |
| #2 | ゼロツー | 57% | 166 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | . | 25 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | ゼロツー | 9 | 0.0028 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ゼロツー | 905 | 0.28 | 24 min |
| #2 | . | 255 | 0.12 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | chasethemoney | +1.73 | 80 | 66 |
| #2 | . | +0.61 | 52 | 44 |
| #3 | ゼロツー | -0.95 | 45 | 76 |





