








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank |
|---|
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 6 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




0 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Your loyalty is impressive.
103 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 72 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 21 | 29% |
| Smokes | 14 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 20 | 28% |
| Molotovs | 17 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $21,190 of utility $68 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KOBBIE | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Sk1L1ner | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Sidekick | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | sealio | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | KOBBIE | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Sk1L1ner | 58% | 12 |
| #3 | Sidekick | 44% | 9 |
| #4 | sealio | 44% | 16 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sk1L1ner | 1 | 0.0044 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | sealio | 41 | 0.13 | 1 min |
| #2 | Sk1L1ner | 21 | 0.09 | 0 min |
| #3 | KOBBIE | 8 | 0.12 | 0 min |
| #4 | Sidekick | 1 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sk1L1ner | +2.94 | 69 | 62 |
| #2 | Sidekick | +0.76 | 48 | 21 |
| #3 | FLOORIAM CaseOpening.com | -1.17 | 34 | 10 |
| #4 | KOBBIE | -2.11 | 63 | 39 |
| #5 | sealio | -2.38 | 70 | 59 |





