








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 703 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 217 matches | ||
| Faceit | 185 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 12 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




34 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4515 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,341 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3408 | 36% |
| Smokes | 2100 | 22% |
| HE Grenades | 2394 | 26% |
| Molotovs | 1439 | 15% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,974,819 of utility $189 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1032 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IJustClick | 62% | 26 |
| #2 | CRIMZ1H | 58% | 31 |
| #3 | Legacy | 58% | 26 |
| #4 | Upstart | 56% | 39 |
| #5 | cronchy | 52% | 31 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | 𝕰𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖑 | 47% | 36 |
| #8 | Tip | 47% | 30 |
| #9 | zim | 45% | 53 |
| #10 | Macneil* | 44% | 57 |
| #11 | Insan1ty ︻芫 ——— | 42% | 50 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ghettobird | 7 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | CRIMZ1H | 4 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Tip | 4 | 0.0063 |
| #4 | zim | 3 | 0.0026 |
| #5 | 𝕰𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖑 | 3 | 0.0040 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ghettobird | 332 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #2 | Tip | 200 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| #3 | zim | 158 | 0.14 | 4 min |
| #4 | IJustClick | 142 | 0.25 | 4 min |
| #5 | Macneil* | 131 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | IJustClick | +3.00 | 81 | 66 |
| #2 | Upstart | +2.33 | 85 | 45 |
| #3 | 𝕰𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖓𝖆𝖑 | +1.81 | 68 | 64 |
| #4 | Tip | +1.75 | 67 | 62 |
| #5 | zim | +0.99 | 79 | 53 |





