








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 370 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Inferno | 55 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 39 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 12 matches | ||
| Premier | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 18 different maps





Our logs show 65 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




20 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2907 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,202 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2339 | 29% |
| Smokes | 1516 | 18% |
| HE Grenades | 2340 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2007 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,645,621 of utility $218 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 61 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | genw3st | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Happy Bab Ross | 46% | 83 |
| #3 | Chlooee | 43% | 21 |
| #4 | The Carpathia | 43% | 42 |
| #5 | c00trt00tr | 41% | 316 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | BaroneT | 30 | 0.0075 |
| #2 | Jborrmann | 16 | 0.0057 |
| #3 | c00trt00tr | 14 | 0.0022 |
| #4 | Happy Bab Ross | 6 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | Joy | 5 | 0.0010 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | c00trt00tr | 608 | 0.10 | 15 min |
| #2 | BaroneT | 378 | 0.09 | 10 min |
| #3 | Jborrmann | 263 | 0.09 | 5 min |
| #4 | The Carpathia | 222 | 0.27 | 6 min |
| #5 | genw3st | 80 | 0.19 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | genw3st | +2.30 | 50 | 65 |
| #2 | Jborrmann | +2.24 | 51 | 55 |
| #3 | OhBother | +0.93 | 63 | 53 |
| #4 | c00trt00tr | -0.28 | 65 | 61 |
| #5 | Happy Bab Ross | -0.39 | 56 | 39 |





