








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1071 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 502 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 96 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 48 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 42 matches | ||
| Wingman | 31 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 30 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Faceit | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 190 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




37 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
8079 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 29,818 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 7957 | 27% |
| Smokes | 8658 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 7443 | 25% |
| Molotovs | 5760 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,561,369 of utility $135 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 584 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | allu | 50% | 145 |
| #2 | DanielskY | 48% | 318 |
| #3 | KarmazynowyTucznik | 46% | 54 |
| #4 | frytka361 | 46% | 179 |
| #5 | UnderForest | 44% | 299 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DanielskY | 40 | 0.0063 |
| #2 | UnderForest | 24 | 0.0043 |
| #3 | allu | 19 | 0.0064 |
| #4 | FRAMUGA | 15 | 0.0058 |
| #5 | frytka361 | 13 | 0.0036 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | DanielskY | 722 | 0.11 | 17 min |
| #2 | allu | 398 | 0.14 | 11 min |
| #3 | UnderForest | 362 | 0.07 | 7 min |
| #4 | m1tacha | 283 | 0.22 | 7 min |
| #5 | FRAMUGA | 143 | 0.06 | 4 min |





