








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 44 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 22 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show No Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
395 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 2,189 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 466 | 21% |
| Smokes | 809 | 37% |
| HE Grenades | 515 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 399 | 18% |
Our logs show you have wasted $204,912 of utility $84 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1 message into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | takina 可愛い | 57% | 7 |
| #2 | 大佬你唔好咁痴線啦 | 44% | 18 |
| #3 | BarryL0712 | 43% | 30 |
| #4 | Chasm | 37% | 52 |
| #5 | 我是一個好學生 | 35% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | ∗起舞弄清影∗何似在人间∗ | 30% | 60 |
| #9 | 1515 | 29% | 70 |
| #10 | itachi | 25% | 16 |
| #11 | Nsc | 20% | 10 |
| #12 | GyPs0pHi1a | 0% | 8 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Chasm | 3 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | 1515 | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | 我是一個好學生 | 2 | 0.0053 |
| #4 | 大佬你唔好咁痴線啦 | 2 | 0.0057 |
| #5 | ∗起舞弄清影∗何似在人间∗ | 1 | 0.0008 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ∗起舞弄清影∗何似在人间∗ | 200 | 0.16 | 5 min |
| #2 | 1515 | 174 | 0.12 | 4 min |
| #3 | Chasm | 121 | 0.11 | 3 min |
| #4 | 大佬你唔好咁痴線啦 | 104 | 0.30 | 2 min |
| #5 | MrGoogle | 78 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 大佬你唔好咁痴線啦 | +9.45 | 95 | 67 |
| #2 | ∗起舞弄清影∗何似在人间∗ | +4.83 | 71 | 45 |
| #3 | SoloPlayer | +4.43 | 72 | 63 |
| #4 | BarryL0712 | +3.00 | 80 | 29 |
| #5 | takina 可愛い | +2.24 | 50 | 52 |





