








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 161 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Mirage | 27 matches | ||
| Premier | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 7 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




13 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
472 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,222 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 482 | 39% |
| Smokes | 283 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 224 | 18% |
| Molotovs | 233 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $234,993 of utility $184 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 195 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | keTzu | 16 | 0.0134 |
| #2 | Ohlgren | 4 | 0.0065 |
| #3 | Raanlunri | 3 | 0.0082 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | keTzu | 280 | 0.23 | 7 min |
| #2 | Ohlgren | 63 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #3 | Neekerin Perse | 19 | 0.13 | 0 min |
| #4 | McBlyat | 15 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | sheesh | 14 | 0.14 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | keTzu | +7.14 | 74 | 74 |
| #2 | Ohlgren | -0.02 | 71 | 53 |
| #3 | McBlyat | -1.26 | 69 | 39 |
| #4 | Haba | -3.18 | 52 | 59 |
| #5 | Neekerin Perse | -3.23 | 34 | 52 |





