








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 21 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 119 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 79 matches | ||
| Wingman | 59 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 59 matches | ||
| Premier | 56 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 35 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 21 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Italy | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 14 different maps





Our logs show 33 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4520 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 21,469 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 6000 | 28% |
| Smokes | 3302 | 15% |
| HE Grenades | 6948 | 32% |
| Molotovs | 5219 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $480,497 of utility $44 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 345 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nochvoc | 73% | 52 |
| #2 | ☬Phoenix☬ PPPDO | 58% | 92 |
| #3 | eXtaz | 53% | 174 |
| #4 | DeWil(); | 48% | 67 |
| #5 | alu | 41% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nochvoc | 73% | 52 |
| #2 | ☬Phoenix☬ PPPDO | 58% | 92 |
| #3 | eXtaz | 53% | 174 |
| #4 | DeWil(); | 48% | 67 |
| #5 | alu | 41% | 32 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eXtaz | 6 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | alu | 3 | 0.0044 |
| #3 | ☬Phoenix☬ PPPDO | 2 | 0.0012 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | eXtaz | 524 | 0.16 | 14 min |
| #2 | ☬Phoenix☬ PPPDO | 257 | 0.15 | 7 min |
| #3 | alu | 151 | 0.22 | 4 min |
| #4 | DeWil(); | 143 | 0.13 | 3 min |
| #5 | Nochvoc | 57 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Nochvoc | +5.05 | 89 | 62 |
| #2 | alu | +3.23 | 82 | 77 |
| #3 | eXtaz | +2.60 | 78 | 66 |
| #4 | ☬Phoenix☬ PPPDO | +1.66 | 69 | 62 |
| #5 | ✪ Felix | +0.51 | 66 | 72 |





