








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 206 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 160 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Basalt | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 16 different maps





Our logs show 27 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




48 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2308 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 5,769 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1032 | 18% |
| Smokes | 367 | 6% |
| HE Grenades | 2913 | 50% |
| Molotovs | 1457 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $621,292 of utility $110 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 161 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jota | 50% | 219 |
| #2 | peachy | 47% | 78 |
| #3 | ifly27 | 46% | 57 |
| #4 | villin | 41% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jota | 50% | 219 |
| #2 | peachy | 47% | 78 |
| #3 | ifly27 | 46% | 57 |
| #4 | villin | 41% | 69 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jota | 41 | 0.0091 |
| #2 | villin | 7 | 0.0050 |
| #3 | peachy | 3 | 0.0019 |
| #4 | ifly27 | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jota | 497 | 0.11 | 13 min |
| #2 | ifly27 | 75 | 0.06 | 2 min |
| #3 | villin | 72 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | peachy | 66 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Jota | +2.09 | 68 | 71 |
| #2 | Doughnut/Donut | +0.55 | 41 | 53 |
| #3 | villin | +0.18 | 75 | 46 |
| #4 | peachy | -3.96 | 40 | 50 |
| #5 | ifly27 | -6.48 | 12 | 54 |





