








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 374 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 198 matches | ||
| Premier | 36 matches | ||
| Wingman | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 34 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2702 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,946 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1681 | 19% |
| Smokes | 2106 | 24% |
| HE Grenades | 2567 | 29% |
| Molotovs | 2592 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,381,468 of utility $203 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 42 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phyl | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | MaSuKa | 64% | 28 |
| #3 | DAR1US | 59% | 63 |
| #4 | Punica | 58% | 24 |
| #5 | 616 | 57% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #7 | Resh | 55% | 162 |
| #8 | ChrisS | 52% | 29 |
| #9 | Bubbleking_Basti | 47% | 17 |
| #10 | NoReturns | 46% | 26 |
| #11 | Hitalot | 41% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Resh | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | cruzzader | 1 | 0.0004 |
| #3 | NoReturns | 1 | 0.0017 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Resh | 572 | 0.16 | 13 min |
| #2 | cruzzader | 402 | 0.17 | 10 min |
| #3 | DAR1US | 269 | 0.19 | 7 min |
| #4 | NoReturns | 183 | 0.31 | 5 min |
| #5 | Punica | 164 | 0.29 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Punica | +3.93 | 78 | 87 |
| #2 | Phyl | +3.11 | 83 | 57 |
| #3 | NoReturns | +2.87 | 84 | 77 |
| #4 | 616 | +1.47 | 73 | 73 |
| #5 | DAR1US | +1.08 | 75 | 78 |





