








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 131 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 71 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Premier | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 2 matches | ||
| Wingman | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 12 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1535 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 3,147 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 689 | 22% |
| Smokes | 593 | 19% |
| HE Grenades | 1066 | 34% |
| Molotovs | 799 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $555,459 of utility $180 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 29 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TheSky'sTheLimit | 63% | 16 |
| #2 | Castle | 53% | 43 |
| #3 | KillaWaff | 50% | 14 |
| #4 | Persephone | 48% | 46 |
| #5 | DirtyBird8 | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Pizza | 26 | 0.0108 |
| #2 | Castle | 18 | 0.0205 |
| #3 | HYSTERIA | 10 | 0.0137 |
| #4 | Persephone | 7 | 0.0075 |
| #5 | Sheeps | 7 | 0.0130 |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Castle | +5.03 | 58 | 68 |
| #2 | JustCalMePug | +2.71 | 59 | 57 |
| #3 | Pizza | +2.68 | 63 | 61 |
| #4 | Manu. | +2.62 | 82 | 69 |
| #5 | HYSTERIA | +0.92 | 19 | 42 |





