








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 128 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 260 matches | ||
| Faceit | 19 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 11 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Agency | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 17 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




22 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2871 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,216 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5552 | 29% |
| Smokes | 5442 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 3576 | 19% |
| Molotovs | 4646 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,030,485 of utility $129 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 584 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | dustybot4011 | 75% | 20 |
| #2 | Burd | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | scowL | 55% | 219 |
| #4 | PlatMessi | 52% | 208 |
| #5 | KleanCut | 52% | 27 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #2 | Burd | 60% | 30 |
| #3 | scowL | 55% | 219 |
| #4 | PlatMessi | 52% | 208 |
| #5 | KleanCut | 52% | 27 |
| #6 | Str1ke | 44% | 61 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PlatMessi | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #2 | scowL | 4 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | dustybot4011 | 3 | 0.0074 |
| #4 | Str1ke | 1 | 0.0008 |
| #5 | KleanCut | 1 | 0.0018 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | scowL | 703 | 0.16 | 16 min |
| #2 | PlatMessi | 464 | 0.11 | 11 min |
| #3 | Str1ke | 185 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #4 | Burd | 51 | 0.08 | 2 min |
| #5 | KleanCut | 43 | 0.08 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | PlatMessi | +2.96 | 79 | 59 |
| #2 | scowL | +1.12 | 77 | 58 |
| #3 | KleanCut | +0.26 | 77 | 57 |
| #4 | Str1ke | -0.65 | 64 | 52 |
| #5 | Burd | -0.66 | 73 | 51 |





