








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 383 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 123 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 5 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1507 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 7,180 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1896 | 26% |
| Smokes | 1838 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 1716 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 1730 | 24% |
Our logs show you have wasted $543,652 of utility $139 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 168 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛BornieSandles♛ | 75% | 16 |
| #2 | Trunkoso | 73% | 11 |
| #3 | WestonST | 71% | 14 |
| #4 | Mr. Gaming | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | 2006 Honda Civic Engine | 52% | 21 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | WestonST | 71% | 14 |
| #4 | Mr. Gaming | 71% | 14 |
| #5 | 2006 Honda Civic Engine | 52% | 21 |
| #6 | vajMOG | 48% | 60 |
| #7 | Karstoner | 47% | 17 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛BornieSandles♛ | 5 | 0.0139 |
| #2 | vajMOG | 4 | 0.0031 |
| #3 | Mr. Gaming | 3 | 0.0096 |
| #4 | Trunkoso | 2 | 0.0082 |
| #5 | 2006 Honda Civic Engine | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛BornieSandles♛ | 134 | 0.37 | 4 min |
| #2 | WestonST | 73 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #3 | vajMOG | 67 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #4 | Karstoner | 56 | 0.16 | 1 min |
| #5 | Mr. Gaming | 43 | 0.14 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ♛BornieSandles♛ | +4.45 | 74 | 73 |
| #2 | WestonST | +3.35 | 51 | 74 |
| #3 | vajMOG | +2.33 | 69 | 52 |
| #4 | Shmang | +0.25 | 44 | 62 |
| #5 | Mr. Gaming | +0.13 | 33 | 60 |





