








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 3 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September
The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 30 matches | ||
| Wingman | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Agency | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Premier | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 15 different maps





Our logs show 2 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




3 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
614 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,951 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 633 | 32% |
| Smokes | 579 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 281 | 14% |
| Molotovs | 458 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $103,891 of utility $87 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 0 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Risu? | 100% | 3 |
| #2 | Koukku | 75% | 4 |
| #3 | LIVONE | 67% | 3 |
| #4 | Flyys | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | seth | 55% | 53 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | Flyys | 67% | 3 |
| #5 | seth | 55% | 53 |
| #6 | seNji- | 50% | 6 |
| #7 | zaNde | 50% | 8 |
| #8 | zeizei | 50% | 14 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seth | 4 | 0.0039 |
| #2 | Flyys | 2 | 0.0556 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | seth | 219 | 0.21 | 4 min |
| #2 | zeizei | 17 | 0.05 | 0 min |
| #3 | LIVONE | 12 | 0.21 | 0 min |
| #4 | zaNde | 11 | 0.06 | 0 min |
| #5 | Risu? | 10 | 0.17 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Holla | +2.67 | 82 | 58 |
| #2 | zeizei | +2.30 | 56 | 46 |
| #3 | LIVONE | +0.52 | 86 | 62 |
| #4 | seNji- | +0.42 | 46 | 60 |
| #5 | Koukku | +0.33 | 62 | 30 |





