








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 369 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 354 matches | ||
| Faceit | 26 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 8 different maps





Our logs show 28 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




10 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3336 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 13,531 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1652 | 12% |
| Smokes | 4106 | 30% |
| HE Grenades | 4713 | 35% |
| Molotovs | 3060 | 23% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,761,442 of utility $194 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 108 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sacdaddy | 54% | 35 |
| #2 | g0s7aR | 52% | 171 |
| #3 | joony | 51% | 188 |
| #4 | Eggsecutart | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | GreenLight™ | 48% | 77 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | joony | 51% | 188 |
| #4 | Eggsecutart | 49% | 41 |
| #5 | GreenLight™ | 48% | 77 |
| #6 | Exit | 48% | 25 |
| #7 | Monday | 32% | 34 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0s7aR | 7 | 0.0019 |
| #2 | joony | 5 | 0.0012 |
| #3 | GreenLight™ | 3 | 0.0018 |
| #4 | Eggsecutart | 3 | 0.0034 |
| #5 | Sacdaddy | 2 | 0.0027 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0s7aR | 819 | 0.22 | 26 min |
| #2 | joony | 241 | 0.06 | 7 min |
| #3 | Eggsecutart | 148 | 0.17 | 3 min |
| #4 | GreenLight™ | 101 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| #5 | Monday | 86 | 0.12 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | g0s7aR | +2.28 | 79 | 82 |
| #2 | Monday | +1.34 | 63 | 67 |
| #3 | joony | +1.09 | 56 | 62 |
| #4 | Eggsecutart | +0.48 | 61 | 62 |
| #5 | GreenLight™ | +0.24 | 58 | 58 |





