








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 1566 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 501 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 12 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 10 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 10 matches | ||
| Wingman | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 3 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 13 different maps





Our logs show 4 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




36 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
6930 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 15,854 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2853 | 18% |
| Smokes | 3109 | 20% |
| HE Grenades | 5300 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 4592 | 29% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,560,225 of utility $202 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2095 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #5 | yukina | 58% | 86 |
| #6 | blood tears | 53% | 111 |
| #7 | carbs | 49% | 59 |
| #8 | cdot:> | 44% | 90 |
| #9 | ⚥ | 41% | 95 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | cdot:> | 403 | 0.22 | 12 min |
| #2 | yukina | 395 | 0.22 | 11 min |
| #3 | blood tears | 268 | 0.11 | 6 min |
| #4 | carbs | 264 | 0.21 | 8 min |
| #5 | snav | 220 | 0.21 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | snav | +5.99 | 88 | 70 |
| #2 | stank pacc | +3.93 | 85 | 33 |
| #3 | Stx | +1.13 | 85 | 52 |
| #4 | nbgee12 | +0.70 | 72 | 60 |
| #5 | yukina | +0.69 | 85 | 61 |





