








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 289 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 111 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 87 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 68 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 50 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 45 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 28 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 27 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 2 matches |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 16 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




7 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1925 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 8,287 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2194 | 26% |
| Smokes | 3113 | 38% |
| HE Grenades | 2197 | 27% |
| Molotovs | 783 | 9% |
Our logs show you have wasted $370,119 of utility $38 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 2 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #4 | CDFH | 41% | 434 |
| #5 | 苏沐橙 | 41% | 256 |
| #6 | Papa Smurf | 40% | 272 |
| #7 | imbroken | 38% | 182 |
| #8 | Kousaka | 35% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CDFH | 2300 | 0.26 | 75 min |
| #2 | Teelan | 680 | 0.17 | 22 min |
| #3 | imbroken | 666 | 0.18 | 19 min |
| #4 | 苏沐橙 | 608 | 0.12 | 18 min |
| #5 | Papa Smurf | 543 | 0.10 | 17 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | CDFH | +3.22 | 76 | 77 |
| #2 | Teelan | +2.96 | 82 | 66 |
| #3 | imbroken | +1.21 | 55 | 63 |
| #4 | LB | +0.08 | 24 | 65 |
| #5 | 苏沐橙 | -0.10 | 66 | 68 |





