








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 935 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 474 matches | ||
| Wingman | 65 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 14 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 11 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 8 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Office | 5 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 4 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 68 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




88 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5240 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 19,718 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5975 | 30% |
| Smokes | 4890 | 25% |
| HE Grenades | 4762 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 4091 | 21% |
Our logs show you have wasted $2,557,466 of utility $190 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 1100 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #3 | ☣ Kwitz ✪ | 48% | 353 |
| #4 | Ess | 47% | 133 |
| #5 | Dax | 46% | 72 |
| #6 | Kalle | 43% | 74 |
| #7 | TechnoFox | 40% | 115 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☣ Kwitz ✪ | 26 | 0.0037 |
| #2 | TechnoFox | 24 | 0.0103 |
| #3 | Dax | 19 | 0.0124 |
| #4 | Ess | 10 | 0.0036 |
| #5 | Måtte | 9 | 0.0024 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ☣ Kwitz ✪ | 509 | 0.07 | 13 min |
| #2 | Ess | 365 | 0.13 | 9 min |
| #3 | Måtte | 254 | 0.07 | 6 min |
| #4 | Dax | 217 | 0.14 | 5 min |
| #5 | TechnoFox | 169 | 0.07 | 5 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ess | +3.58 | 37 | 65 |
| #2 | Dax | +0.21 | 44 | 38 |
| #3 | ☣ Kwitz ✪ | -0.02 | 56 | 61 |
| #4 | MaNameIsJeff | -0.08 | 54 | 62 |
| #5 | Måtte | -1.95 | 17 | 49 |





