








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 729 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Competitive Dust2 | 110 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 88 matches | ||
| Premier | 79 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 43 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 18 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 16 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 15 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 5 matches | ||
| Faceit | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 14 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




24 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
5374 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 17,604 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 5599 | 32% |
| Smokes | 5144 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2284 | 13% |
| Molotovs | 4577 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,051,754 of utility $104 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 313 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not.Särmä | 60% | 57 |
| #2 | Lehmän Maitola | 53% | 240 |
| #3 | PAPA'S HARD THROBBING HAMMER | 52% | 102 |
| #4 | Tsussi | 50% | 255 |
| #5 | Jared | 46% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not.Särmä | 60% | 57 |
| #2 | Lehmän Maitola | 53% | 240 |
| #3 | PAPA'S HARD THROBBING HAMMER | 52% | 102 |
| #4 | Tsussi | 50% | 255 |
| #5 | Jared | 46% | 48 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Lehmän Maitola | 17 | 0.0035 |
| #2 | Not.Särmä | 7 | 0.0062 |
| #3 | Tsussi | 3 | 0.0006 |
| #4 | PAPA'S HARD THROBBING HAMMER | 2 | 0.0010 |
| #5 | Jared | 2 | 0.0022 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tsussi | 939 | 0.18 | 21 min |
| #2 | Lehmän Maitola | 559 | 0.12 | 14 min |
| #3 | Not.Särmä | 310 | 0.27 | 8 min |
| #4 | Jared | 166 | 0.18 | 4 min |
| #5 | PAPA'S HARD THROBBING HAMMER | 125 | 0.06 | 3 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Not.Särmä | +2.24 | 70 | 60 |
| #2 | Tsussi | +1.59 | 71 | 69 |
| #3 | Vesantori123 | +1.55 | 79 | 65 |
| #4 | Jared | -1.36 | 59 | 70 |
| #5 | PAPA'S HARD THROBBING HAMMER | -2.03 | 44 | 55 |





