








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 86 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Faceit | 146 matches | ||
| Premier | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




6 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3966 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 10,038 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2529 | 25% |
| Smokes | 2609 | 26% |
| HE Grenades | 2252 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2648 | 26% |
Our logs show you have wasted $751,228 of utility $134 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 287 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Th0usT | 58% | 144 |
| #2 | kyuro | 55% | 67 |
| #3 | DrPinkmaN | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | I_Rekk | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | Tralalero Tralala | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Th0usT | 58% | 144 |
| #2 | kyuro | 55% | 67 |
| #3 | DrPinkmaN | 55% | 20 |
| #4 | I_Rekk | 55% | 22 |
| #5 | Tralalero Tralala | 44% | 25 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Th0usT | 2 | 0.0006 |
| #2 | kyuro | 2 | 0.0014 |
| #3 | I_Rekk | 2 | 0.0040 |
| #4 | DrPinkmaN | 1 | 0.0023 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Th0usT | 424 | 0.13 | 12 min |
| #2 | DrPinkmaN | 101 | 0.23 | 2 min |
| #3 | I_Rekk | 76 | 0.15 | 1 min |
| #4 | kyuro | 66 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #5 | Tralalero Tralala | 39 | 0.07 | 1 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ozura | +2.97 | 85 | 67 |
| #2 | Tralalero Tralala | +0.35 | 64 | 44 |
| #3 | I_Rekk | -0.85 | 75 | 54 |
| #4 | Th0usT | -1.11 | 55 | 56 |
| #5 | kyuro | -1.61 | 66 | 43 |





