








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 570 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 293 matches | ||
| Faceit | 16 matches | ||
| Wingman | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 9 different maps





Our logs show 21 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




15 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3651 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,067 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2180 | 20% |
| Smokes | 2524 | 23% |
| HE Grenades | 3649 | 33% |
| Molotovs | 2714 | 25% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,183,856 of utility $158 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 285 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Shaufew✪ | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Sometimes Maybe Shit | 47% | 90 |
| #3 | bluebutton | 46% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | ✪Shaufew✪ | 62% | 21 |
| #2 | Sometimes Maybe Shit | 47% | 90 |
| #3 | bluebutton | 46% | 52 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | bluebutton | 5 | 0.0045 |
| #2 | Sometimes Maybe Shit | 3 | 0.0016 |
| #3 | ✪Shaufew✪ | 2 | 0.0047 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Sometimes Maybe Shit | 85 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| #2 | ✪Shaufew✪ | 73 | 0.17 | 2 min |
| #3 | bluebutton | 58 | 0.05 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Plantation Owner | +1.76 | 71 | 60 |
| #2 | ✪Shaufew✪ | +0.46 | 77 | 59 |
| #3 | bluebutton | -0.48 | 70 | 62 |
| #4 | Sometimes Maybe Shit | -2.78 | 56 | 46 |





