








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 293 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 168 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 7 matches | ||
| Faceit | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 10 different maps





Our logs show 8 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




2 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
1451 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 1,973 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 197 | 10% |
| Smokes | 539 | 27% |
| HE Grenades | 960 | 49% |
| Molotovs | 277 | 14% |
Our logs show you have wasted $243,615 of utility $52 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 9 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | 3HP Cat | 62% | 29 |
| #2 | Fortnite Franz | 58% | 26 |
| #3 | шлюха с софтом! | 52% | 56 |
| #4 | Blahaj Bitch | 52% | 62 |
| #5 | Ahri | 52% | 62 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Ahri | 117 | 0.09 | 3 min |
| #2 | Fortnite Franz | 59 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #3 | Will [Kilo] Graham | 37 | 0.11 | 1 min |
| #4 | Jack Crawford | 32 | 0.10 | 1 min |
| #5 | Blahaj Bitch | 10 | 0.01 | 0 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Estrogen Aimbot | +3.87 | 88 | 36 |
| #2 | Blahaj Bitch | +3.32 | 88 | 36 |
| #3 | 3HP Cat | +3.26 | 83 | 39 |
| #4 | шлюха с софтом! | +2.93 | 90 | 43 |
| #5 | LW | ≧◔◡◔≦ | +2.00 | 90 | 29 |





