








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 316 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September



The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 94 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 72 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 63 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 61 matches | ||
| Competitive Vertigo | 57 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 40 matches | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 38 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 32 matches | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 27 matches | ||
| Faceit | 23 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 9 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Office | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Italy | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 17 different maps





Our logs show 47 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




32 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
4884 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 12,574 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 1958 | 16% |
| Smokes | 2637 | 21% |
| HE Grenades | 3905 | 31% |
| Molotovs | 4074 | 32% |
Our logs show you have wasted $973,320 of utility $81 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 156 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | MustaMies | 63% | 139 |
| #2 | Onlyunclebens | 57% | 174 |
| #3 | TupaRupsu | 57% | 171 |
| #4 | ♡✧⭒Larzali⭒✧♡ | 54% | 236 |
| #5 | m1n1ster1 | 51% | 74 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Tohtori Sykerö | 40 | 0.0114 |
| #2 | Onlyunclebens | 22 | 0.0061 |
| #3 | Jackson Barret | 18 | 0.0202 |
| #4 | ♡✧⭒Larzali⭒✧♡ | 10 | 0.0022 |
| #5 | MustaMies | 9 | 0.0033 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Onlyunclebens | 692 | 0.19 | 17 min |
| #2 | Tohtori Sykerö | 607 | 0.17 | 13 min |
| #3 | TupaRupsu | 532 | 0.15 | 14 min |
| #4 | ♡✧⭒Larzali⭒✧♡ | 189 | 0.04 | 3 min |
| #5 | MustaMies | 176 | 0.07 | 4 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Cool Af Xenomorph | +4.01 | 77 | 48 |
| #2 | Onlyunclebens | +3.45 | 62 | 75 |
| #3 | Jackson Barret | +2.65 | 93 | 16 |
| #4 | Tohtori Sykerö | +1.42 | 79 | 56 |
| #5 | TupaRupsu | +0.89 | 63 | 53 |





