








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 415 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September




The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 119 matches | ||
| Wingman | 7 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 6 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Grail | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Edin | 4 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Palacio | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Jura | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 1 match | ||
| Faceit | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Golden | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Nuke | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 19 different maps





Our logs show 39 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




8 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
2290 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 9,100 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 2078 | 23% |
| Smokes | 2554 | 28% |
| HE Grenades | 2007 | 22% |
| Molotovs | 2461 | 27% |
Our logs show you have wasted $510,709 of utility $111 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 378 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | VAC | 63% | 41 |
| #2 | BUZUSTA 0_0 | 59% | 58 |
| #3 | Pogge | 58% | 12 |
| #4 | Paggen | 57% | 99 |
| #5 | TTV Thirt33nwolf | 55% | 89 |
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | Pajani | 52% | 69 |
| #9 | Janne långben | 49% | 55 |
| #10 | ✪ Luraren | 43% | 63 |
| #11 | HANK | 42% | 19 |
| #12 | fason | 38% | 13 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | TTV Thirt33nwolf | 5 | 0.0027 |
| #2 | Pajani | 5 | 0.0034 |
| #3 | VAC | 5 | 0.0059 |
| #4 | Phoenix | 4 | 0.0037 |
| #5 | BUZUSTA 0_0 | 3 | 0.0025 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Phoenix | 221 | 0.20 | 6 min |
| #2 | BUZUSTA 0_0 | 205 | 0.17 | 5 min |
| #3 | Janne långben | 197 | 0.17 | 4 min |
| #4 | TTV Thirt33nwolf | 96 | 0.05 | 3 min |
| #5 | Paggen | 78 | 0.04 | 2 min |
| Pos | Player | Leetify Rating | Aim Rating | Utility Rating |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | mummenator | +2.36 | 67 | 71 |
| #2 | ✪ Luraren | +1.35 | 78 | 49 |
| #3 | Paggen | +1.07 | 74 | 48 |
| #4 | Phoenix | +0.23 | 66 | 68 |
| #5 | fason | +0.19 | 57 | 62 |





