








System Report: Annual playtime data retrived
Downloading "touch_grass.exe"


The System has confirmed 742 achievements have been successfully gathered this year* *since we updated them in September





The system has detected peak performance.
You Personal Bests have been compiled for easy screenshotting and bragging rights.





















| Mode | Matches Played | Highest Rank | |
|---|---|---|---|
| Premier | 251 matches | ||
| Wingman | 44 matches | ||
| Competitive Dust2 | 20 matches | ||
| Competitive Inferno | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Overpass | 3 matches | ||
| Competitive Anubis | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Train | 2 matches | ||
| Competitive Mirage | 1 match | ||
| Competitive Ancient | 1 match |
Mapping data processed:
You've clocked in on 11 different maps





Our logs show 11 Chickens Have been neutralized under your command
To pay $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Feathered Bird Investigators




11 of your human shaped victims were your teammates...
Chickens... Friends... Is nothing sacred?
3151 of your kills registered with elevated levels of pizzazz


System Performance Report:
You experienced several "do or die" situations this year.
Well? Did you do, or did you die?
The System has registered 11,660 total utility used this year.
| Util Type | Amount Thrown | % of Util |
|---|---|---|
| Flashes | 3326 | 29% |
| Smokes | 3344 | 29% |
| HE Grenades | 2807 | 24% |
| Molotovs | 2183 | 19% |
Our logs show you have wasted $1,184,959 of utility $155 per round
To pay another $5,000 to remove you from the FBI* Watchlist
*Frag Budget Investigators (Defo not the same guys as up there^)





Chat activity report generated...
You've entered 22 messages into the system this year. It was all positive, right? :)
These words were the most typed in 2025*; your typed words are highlighted.
Hover the words to see more info!
*Since we started tracking in June 2025 and with some censoring...

Talk about back pain because these 3 are heavy lifters...
| Pos | Player | Win Rate | Matches Played |
|---|---|---|---|
| #8 | NumseDoc | 42% | 158 |
| #9 | Alucard | 40% | 110 |
| #10 | Køleskabet | 40% | 158 |
| #11 | Romesh Uswathta Liyonage Perera | 39% | 179 |
| #12 | Detektt | 33% | 102 |
| Pos | Player | Total Team Kills | Per Round |
|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Kirneh | 18 | 0.0034 |
| #2 | Køleskabet | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #3 | NumseDoc | 3 | 0.0009 |
| #4 | Bob Punjuna | 2 | 0.0011 |
| #5 | The Magnanimous | 1 | 0.0004 |
| Pos | Player | Times Flashed | Per Round | Flash Duration |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| #1 | Detektt | 456 | 0.21 | 13 min |
| #2 | Kirneh | 385 | 0.07 | 11 min |
| #3 | Køleskabet | 304 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #4 | NumseDoc | 301 | 0.09 | 8 min |
| #5 | Romesh Uswathta Liyonage Perera | 280 | 0.08 | 8 min |





